Sunday, March 4, 2012

Little Yellow Room

I think we all have a place in which we escape to in our mind, a tropical paradise, a fond memory, a hope or dream we wish to pursue. I too, have that place and mine is a little yellow room.
Two years ago, as many of you know, Rhett and left our city dwelling and ventured out to Joliet. We rented the cutest 1920's style bungalow, with lots of room, charm, a yard for the boys, and our family right down the street. After eleven months though, of 3 hour daily commutes, we traded all this and returned to the city for more of a quality of life, one in which we actually see each other during the week!
Moving from a quaint (read, tiny) condo to a 3 bedroom, plus den, house requires a lot more furniture, as you can only imagine. We worked hard to fill all our newly acquired space with a lot of help from my mom's expert eye (and extra furniture) and had the house looking like a home in no time. There was one room, however that remained empty. A little yellow room, right next to our bedroom. It had perfect sunlight, space, and a gender neutral color, that would one day hold our precious little one. There would be days that I would walk in there in the morning, coffee cup in hand, and imagine what the room would look like, picturing a rocker in the corner, where Rhett and I would ease our child to sleep, or share bedtime stories. Yes, there were days that simply walking into that room would fill me with a complete sense of happiness and hope.
There were days too, that I couldn't even go in the room, leaving the door closed, as the sight of the empty room was too much for me, it's vacancy reminding me of the vacant feeling that I often would carry in my heart.
Two years later, I carry that yellow room with me, sometimes an escape for me, a lovely place to travel to, a wonderful place of hope of what's to come. Other days, it remains a place that creeps into my mind, that I quickly try to flee from, that all too familiar vacant feeling creeping back in.
I walk through my days, sometimes telling myself that that little yellow room could be many things one day, and maybe the head interior decorator Himself has other plans for that room, and I try very hard to accept whatever design He has in mind, but in my prayers, I do put in my two sense, that a crib, and a rocking chair might look fabulous after all...

1 comment:

  1. A rocker and a crib and yellow walls may still be in the offing. Someone once told me that as a human being we have the right and freedom to hope. I believe hope allows those who suffer or experience so many difficult things in life, tornado sufferers, cancer patients, financially strapped, whatever dilemma to look to a better day, a better sunshine, a "yellow room". Don't ever give up hope, it is a wonderful and powerful thing for us all.